Hello Friends~
Welcome back to Phoenix Journals ~ my newest offering from the alchemical Field of Spirit Seeds!
I hope today finds you amongst those least affected by the heat and flooding across the country. Dynamic times, I tell you.
Did you read about the deadly landslide in Georgia?
Have you ever heard of a landslide happening in Georgia?
I had not until yesterday.
True to the Alchemical axiom of “as above, so below,” the storms are not limited to my external environment.
I’m angry, and I don’t think I’m alone.
Angry at all the ways our magic is pruned before we even have the words to name it.
Angry at all the limitations and fear and staying small to safeguard the status quo.
Angry at all the ways our blooms are pruned before they get a chance to blossom.
Angry at how those primal wounds act as a barricade to love, forcing us to WORK for it as though we needed a reason to deserve it.
Angry at all the ways this world separates us from ourselves and each other, from connection and belonging, from what is real and true and essential.
From our very souls.
I recognize the fact that I’m in avoidance mode.
The galvanizing energy of anger is SO much more comfortable than the fear of the unknown. It’s easy to fall prey to the perceived agency of anger when fear is present. A false sense of empowerment that’s bound to disappoint.
The truth is, no matter how much I rage at the state of the world, it doesn’t help me find a new home.
So, reigning in my wrath, I shed a merciful light on my Self and get back to work.
Yesterday the search for a new home began! Truth be told, John, my Partner, did all the work.
While I cooked and wrote and took the dogs out, he compiled a list of available places with links for me to review based on the criteria we had discussed.
John actually ENJOYS looking for new homes. For some reason, the money factor (bad credit, no savings) doesn’t temper his enthusiasm.
It’s good to see the “anything’s possible” side of him shine through. It’s been a Shadowed year for my Love. Dark Night of the Soul times, my friends.
I picked through all the links he sent me and contacted multiple properties I found appealing. I wasn’t taken to the point of calling on any of them at this point and started researching Vrbo and other monthly long-term off-season rentals.
I want to live in a cabin in the woods with a wood-burning stove and a nearby stream with clear, crisp, rushing water. Surrounded by lush vegetation with abundant foraging and wildcrafting opportunities. Within a ten-minute drive of a lake would be ideal. Pet-friendly and reliable internet (or cell service at the least) are non-negotiables.
I have romantic ideations of spending the winter curled up in front of a fire with my fur babies.
Writing and creating and learning and serving ~ a “back to basics” season of nourishing psychic and hopefully financial expansion ~ surrounded by water to balance the fire magic Work I will be stewarding.
I’m puttin’ it out there, Big U!
We experienced severe storms and flooding yesterday which disrupted our internet service, making the search that much more frustrating. I still don’t understand why weather is an ongoing issue for Spectrum. It seems the second the humidity rises above 90%, shit goes sideways.
I’m sure there’s a technological explanation, I just don’t have it. If you do, let me know.
Refresh, refresh refresh….
Sigh. Feeling discouraged.
© Kelley Murphy, 2023.
Thank you so much for reading! xo
This publication is growing from seed, scatter it to the wind and share it with your friends!
I love that you put your vision of your new home in your article for the Universe to see how much you want it!! It sounds lovely!! I am also sending you my high vibes to add to your high vibes so that you manifest your dream cabin for you and the furbabies!! I also love the color violet that you are trying to achieve for your website!
Thank you for sharing all the feels you are going through in this moment. I appreciate your vulnerability and honesty!